Monday, May 27, 2013
Sunday, May 5, 2013
Signs
I had to laugh... I'm sorry folks, I never usually read over my posted Blog as you the reader see it. My Brother Gordy was saying that the white on black "messes with his eyes"... Now I know what he means. I'll change it to black text on white... I just always liked the look of white text on black. Though I think it's because I do my "blogging" often late at night and in the dark.
A few times when I was in Vancouver recently, my friend Thomas and I noticed that Mike's wife's name seemed to be "appearing" everywhere.
The other night while walking on the train bridge in Fredericton, I came across a section of the side rail with "I lov you Mandy xoxo" etched into the wood. I went back last night and got the attached photo:
A few times when I was in Vancouver recently, my friend Thomas and I noticed that Mike's wife's name seemed to be "appearing" everywhere.
The other night while walking on the train bridge in Fredericton, I came across a section of the side rail with "I lov you Mandy xoxo" etched into the wood. I went back last night and got the attached photo:
Friday, May 3, 2013
Where to start....
Ever since the morning of April 19th, I haven't been here, I haven't been anywhere. one of the most tragic events I can think of amongst my most close personal friends occurred that morning. I wont go into any details suffice to say, my best friend lost his wife. That he is shattered is an understatement. He loved her with all his heart and told me they were soul mates. You could see and feel the energy emanating from both of them. She was beautiful, smart, funny, quick witted and so very talented. He is, smart, great looking, funny, not so quick witted, but an amazingly talented man. That the two should meet up together in this lifetime, might lend proof to our lives being preordained.
Upon hearing the news, I knew right away I needed to be at my Brother's side. Some good friends of our that live close to him, set into action and helped to maintain some sense of sanity, to the insanity of what had happened. My best friends parents are too elderly to go out West and his sister is fighting cancer. I had to go for everyone here who loves him, and carry that message to him in the most crucial of times. The friends that were taking care of him, not only helped him in every way, but also helped to ensure I could make it out west. Havning a Brother that works for Westjet, my friend asked her Brother if he might donate his "buddy pass" to me, so I could fly out, otherwise, the cost to fly out to Vancouver from here is astronomical and the emergency trip more than likely wouldnt have happened had it not been for that "Buddy Pass". My endless thanx and gratitude to them.
On Tuesday April 23, I made a bittersweet return to Vancouver. I spent as much time as I could with my best friend, knowing there was really nothing I could do, no power to bring back who he had lost and it broke my heart to see him in such pain....Even now thinking about it, tears stream from my eyes. I've never cried so hard in my life. And all my pain, for him or my arthritis, was NOTHING compared to the pain and torture he was going through...
When I first got to his side, he was barely eating and only talking in a whisper, he shook violently and moan in grief... I'd never seen this side of him, I don't think he had either...
I accompanied him to the viewing and I met her parents, we grieved together for a beautiful woman who left us much to soon.
I had not planned to speak at the memorial, but at the last minute, felt I had something to say. I can't recall much of what I said. I know I said, that he was my Brother and I loved him dearly. I remember saying how much we all loved her and how she had touched so many people's lives when they had just recently visited us in our home town here. I remember asking, almost pleading with all of our friends and family's there in attendance to please watch over my best friend, and in a month, in two or six months, they had to be there with him, never leave him alone, never let him feel alone or that he can't turn to them for anything.
The days after the memorial were spent consoling and trying to convince him he was not to blame... I think guilt comes with every passing of someone's loved one. 'What could we have done?' ' If only, we had done this or that'... But it's all futile, because it wont bring anyone back, it wont heal any wounds, but it is part of the process.
It was the most difficult moment to leave him. I know he's in good hands, but he's my best bud and again, it rips my heart in half to think of his pain and again to know, there's nothing that anyone can do, but let time heal the wound, more than likely never to fully mend.
On a little bit of a brighter note. I did manage some time to meet with former co workers, colleagues and friends for a lunch at my favorite Vancouver Schezuan restaurant. Got to hang out with my "other" best friend Jay, and we got to visit an old friend of ours and smoke some fine cigars.
I'm back home now. The reality of what happened still wont set in. I met with my best friends family last night, to help to explain to them what happened. How someone so beautiful so smart, who seemed to have everything one could want in the World, could be gone. None of us can make sense of it.
I don't think we ever will...
Upon hearing the news, I knew right away I needed to be at my Brother's side. Some good friends of our that live close to him, set into action and helped to maintain some sense of sanity, to the insanity of what had happened. My best friends parents are too elderly to go out West and his sister is fighting cancer. I had to go for everyone here who loves him, and carry that message to him in the most crucial of times. The friends that were taking care of him, not only helped him in every way, but also helped to ensure I could make it out west. Havning a Brother that works for Westjet, my friend asked her Brother if he might donate his "buddy pass" to me, so I could fly out, otherwise, the cost to fly out to Vancouver from here is astronomical and the emergency trip more than likely wouldnt have happened had it not been for that "Buddy Pass". My endless thanx and gratitude to them.
On Tuesday April 23, I made a bittersweet return to Vancouver. I spent as much time as I could with my best friend, knowing there was really nothing I could do, no power to bring back who he had lost and it broke my heart to see him in such pain....Even now thinking about it, tears stream from my eyes. I've never cried so hard in my life. And all my pain, for him or my arthritis, was NOTHING compared to the pain and torture he was going through...
When I first got to his side, he was barely eating and only talking in a whisper, he shook violently and moan in grief... I'd never seen this side of him, I don't think he had either...
I accompanied him to the viewing and I met her parents, we grieved together for a beautiful woman who left us much to soon.
I had not planned to speak at the memorial, but at the last minute, felt I had something to say. I can't recall much of what I said. I know I said, that he was my Brother and I loved him dearly. I remember saying how much we all loved her and how she had touched so many people's lives when they had just recently visited us in our home town here. I remember asking, almost pleading with all of our friends and family's there in attendance to please watch over my best friend, and in a month, in two or six months, they had to be there with him, never leave him alone, never let him feel alone or that he can't turn to them for anything.
The days after the memorial were spent consoling and trying to convince him he was not to blame... I think guilt comes with every passing of someone's loved one. 'What could we have done?' ' If only, we had done this or that'... But it's all futile, because it wont bring anyone back, it wont heal any wounds, but it is part of the process.
It was the most difficult moment to leave him. I know he's in good hands, but he's my best bud and again, it rips my heart in half to think of his pain and again to know, there's nothing that anyone can do, but let time heal the wound, more than likely never to fully mend.
On a little bit of a brighter note. I did manage some time to meet with former co workers, colleagues and friends for a lunch at my favorite Vancouver Schezuan restaurant. Got to hang out with my "other" best friend Jay, and we got to visit an old friend of ours and smoke some fine cigars.
I'm back home now. The reality of what happened still wont set in. I met with my best friends family last night, to help to explain to them what happened. How someone so beautiful so smart, who seemed to have everything one could want in the World, could be gone. None of us can make sense of it.
I don't think we ever will...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)